"I should have won"... A woman's confession revealing her competitive spirit over certification exam results

A psychological aspect where competitiveness can play a role even in romantic relationships has been revealed. A woman appearing on the JTBC entertainment program 'Love War' mentioned a certification exam she took with her boyfriend in the past and confessed the complex emotions she felt at the time.

"There's no way you could pass"... The moment they faced each other as competitors, not lovers

In the video, the participant explained her experience of challenging the sports instructor certification exam together with her former boyfriend. At the time, she thought she had studied hard for the exam, but the result was a failure, while conversely, her boyfriend, whom she thought had not studied, passed, which was the beginning of the conflict.

Recalling the situation at the time, the participant expressed her feelings, saying, "Because we were competitors and not lovers, I couldn't fail and there was no way you could pass, so I had to beat you." In particular, she candidly mentioned that she felt competitive regarding the result of her boyfriend passing while she failed.

Refusal of training following the passing grade, "You shouldn't do better than me"

The competitive spirit continued even after the exam results. The participant explained the situation where she had to undergo additional training after passing, and revealed an anecdote where her boyfriend cried and demanded that she not take the training. Regarding the reason, the participant said, "Because I couldn't get (the certification) issued right now, I think I felt that my boyfriend shouldn't do better than me."

The participant expressed her own bewilderment at such an attitude. She questioned why, if one is a person with a competitive spirit, they should strive to overcome difficulties, yet why she displayed this 'selective competitiveness' toward someone who is her lover. She followed up by reflecting on her behavior at the time, saying, "I don't know why I showed competitiveness toward my boyfriend instead of someone else."

The psychology of basic disregard and selective anger

The participant also mentioned her attitude toward her boyfriend. Explaining the feelings she felt when her boyfriend appeared not to be studying properly, she confessed that she had a tendency to fundamentally disregard him. This is linked to 'selective anger' that occurs in romantic relationships, showing the psychological mechanism at the time when she treated her partner as an object of competitiveness.